Joke No. 73

A dog named Sex

Everybody who has a dog calls him "Rover" or "Boy", I call mine "Sex". He's a great pal but he has caused me a great deal of embarrassment.

When I went to City Hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk I would like a license for Sex.

He said, "I'd like one too!" then I said, "But this is a dog." He said he didn't care what she looked like.

Then I said, "You don't understand, I've had Sex since I was 9 years old." He winked and said, "You must have been quite a kid."

When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the motel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me and a special room for Sex.

He said, "You don't need a special room . As long as you pay your bill we don't care what you do."

I said, "Look, you don't seem to understand, Sex keeps me awake at night."

The clerk said, "Funny--I have the same problem."

One day I entered Sex in a contest, but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there, looking disappointed. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me I should have sold my own tickets.

"But you don't understand," I said, "I had hoped to have Sex on TV." He said, "Now that cable is all over the place it's no big deal anymore."

When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog, I said,"Your Honor, I had Sex before I was married."The judge said,"This courtroom isn't a confessional. Stick to the case, please." Then I told him that after I was married , Sex left me. He said "That's not unusual. It happens to a lot people."

Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came over to me and asked, "What are you doing in this alley at 4 o'clock in the morning?"

I told him that I was looking for Sex. My case comes up Friday.